The Bad Girl's Guide to Goddess Health
One of my least desirable feelings is being hung-over. I've been there
so many times as a partying teenager and young adult that by the time
I turned 21 I was sick of alcohol. I was sick of waking up and reaching
for the Advil and making sure I had the right amount of water by my bedside
every weekend. I had the perfect remedy and routine down for relieving
the morning-after aches and pains. That's when I knew things could be
I remember when my friend Lisa took me out for my 21st birthday and I
ordered an obnoxiously large and strong cocktail: A Long Island Iced Tea,
to be exact. This is a potent blend of ALL the white liquors with a splash
of Coca-Cola and sour mix. I got so sick I spent the rest of the afternoon
in the car while my friend continued to enjoy our shopping plans.
The point is: I didn't really want the drink. I just thought that's what
you did on your 21st birthday to celebrate.
The standard repertoire of experiencing fun, pleasure and letting ourselves
be "bad" is so limited. It usually includes drinking too much,
eating in excess and putting our body through stress. There's got to be
a better way.
Training Your Inner Bad Girl
You have an inner bad girl and she is chomping at the bit. In fact, she
can't wait to party with you. You know there's nothing like a special
occasion, such as the holidays, to give us an excuse to pull up a chair
to the buffet.
Let's get one thing clear. If you don't train your inner bad girl she
will school you. This can be fun at times. You get to relax and let it
all hang out and let someone else run the show. In this day-and-age of
doing so much, it can be a relief.
Here are common ways she likes to make herself known:
- Just when you're feeling really great,
she tries to sabotage your health efforts with large amounts of chocolate
- When you feel bored she likes to raid
the fridge and look for something. And no matter what you eat or drink,
you never feel satisfied.
- When it comes to fun, the things she immediately
goes for are cocktails, sugar, recreational drugs and anything that
relieves the inner pressure,
- She likes for you to stay out too late
and eat/drink too much when you've got big plans the next day/the
- She's the one who say's "What the
hell, I'm already off track, might as well..."
You know what I'm talking about. She likes to party, she likes to stir
things up and her actions generally result in some sort of imbalance.
However, I believe it's ALWAYS better to consciously binge than unconsciously
binge, so acknowledge her. (By the way, she loves to be acknowledged.)
My intention is to raise your awareness and give you some new options
to experiment with.
Why do we look to food and drink as medicine and entertainment? Here
are my two cents as to why we let our inner bad girl have her way with
- It is usually way more fun than whatever
is going on in our lives.
- Our lives could be a bit juicier and for
the moment, a binge looks more exciting than a current situation.
- Something's botheringus and we may not
want to feel it fully.
- There's an unmet need in our primary food.
Primary food is anything that feeds us, but doesn't come on a plate.
Things like kisses, hugs, movement, hobbies, great conversation, intimacy,
feeling connected, fulfilling sex, work we enjoy, a spiritual life,
feeling accepted, etc...
- Lack of awareness around our options to
party, have fun, feel connected, and blow off steam without messing
with our bodies.
- We've waited too long to do something
nice for ourselves. We've reached a point of exhaustion / overload
/ over-stimulation / over-stressed / burned out / etc... In this place
it is nearly impossible to think clearly and come up with new ideas.
- Like all women, we have a natural desire
for expansion, lightness and bliss. However we do have choices on
how we get ourselves to feel that way.
Anticipate your inner desires to be bad instead of waiting for them
to bite you in the bum.
Giving your inner bad girl something to do and anticipating her desires
is key to really enjoying getting healthy. Otherwise, how will your inner
health goddess ever stand a chance against Miss Baddy Bad-ass who likes
to be a little naughty and mess with your health efforts? There's only
one way. Throw your inner bad girl some attention and give her something
to chomp on.
When struggling to do something healthy, spice it up and invite your
inner bad girl along. She can be really inspiring and can make the un-fun
into a really good time. For example:
Can't seem to get off your couch to exercise? Find your movement edge.
- Been thinking about yoga? Get a yoga-for-couples
video and do it naked with your partner.
- Bored with exercise? Sign up for a class
that feels like an edge to you: latin dancing, rock climbing, Argentine
tango lessons, African dance classes, etc.
- Hire a gorgeous personal trainer
get rid of your favorite party foods, upgrade!
- Love your chocolate? Get yourself the
best you can buy, melt it and paint your breasts and ask your partner
to help you with your chocolate cravings
- Serve aphrodisiac fruit smoothies at your
next party by adding damiana herbal extract and chocolate syrup.
Work stressing you out? Build reserves of self-care.
- I've started taking Mondays off, and every
week I get to feel like I'm being bad. Everyone else is working and
I'm pretending it's Sunday.
- Go ahead, take a day off from work when
you feel GOOD vs. only when you feel like you absolutely need it.
- Delete some emails for the hell of it.
We purchase reserves of computer paper, paper towels and toilet paper.
Why not build a reserve of self-care? It's like credit in the Bank of
You. When stressful times hit, you are far less reactive if you've been
taking care of yourself. This stops the cycle of only taking great care
of yourself when you're sick and run down. And that is an expensive way
Feeling pressured? Squeeze some life back into your Primary Food.
- Take an inspiring relationship course
with your partner because things are going well, instead of only when
things start to crumble.
- Throw a get-together for no reason and
have everyone bring food and drinks and create activities or theme
that doesn't revolve around boozing it up. Sure have some cocktails!
Also use your creative thinking to create connection without (or with
less) alcohol. If you need an idea, check out the book The Bad
Girl's Guide to the Party Life. It's a laugh-out-loud guide to
- Get sensual and remember you are a woman.
Listen to music that puts you in your sensual, create a spa evening,
take yourself on a date, do something! Go on a pleasure diet for the
love of Goddess!
- Have a fun and silly date with your partner
or close friends.
I'll create fun and healthy activities to bypass Ms. Baddy Bad-Ass's
attempts to get some attention from me. And it is a discipline. Pleasure,
joy, fun and living a juicy life form a discipline. Women are used to
suffering, struggling and giving ourselves a hard time. Let's give it
up and find joy in our self-care, eating well and moving our bodies!
The more zany, fun and exciting you can make your health pursuits, the
more likely you'll want to stick with them and the less likely you'll
look to food and drink as entertainment and medication.
Now doesn't that sound like fun?